Observation requires patience, empathy, humility, and courage. It asks us to see people and situations as they are, not as we assume or prefer them to be.

By Abdullah Usman Morai | Sweden

In the fast-paced, digitally connected world we inhabit, it has become increasingly difficult to simply observe. We see something or someone, and within seconds, our minds craft a label. “He’s lazy.” “She’s rude.” “That’s wrong.” We rarely pause to ask: Am I observing reality, or am I judging it?

This article explores the subtle but powerful difference between observing and judging. It dives into why humans often rush to judgment, how this habit shapes our lives and societies, and why reclaiming the discipline of observation may be the most radical and humane act of our time.

The Fundamental Difference: Observation vs. Judgment

At its core, observation is descriptive, while judgment is evaluative.

To observe is to notice without interpreting. For example:

• Observation: “He arrived at 10:00 AM.”
• Judgment: “He’s always late and doesn’t care about others’ time.”

One states the fact; the other applies meaning, often with bias.

In psychology, this distinction is central to practices like mindfulness, where awareness without judgment is key to mental clarity and emotional stability. A mindful person may notice, “I feel tightness in my chest,” without immediately concluding, “I’m anxious and weak.”

The problem arises when judgments become automatic, shaping how we treat others, how we see ourselves, and how we interpret the world around us.

The Psychology Behind Why We Judge

Humans are meaning-making creatures. From an evolutionary perspective, being able to make quick assessments (friend or foe, safe or dangerous) was essential for survival. But in modern life, this mental shortcut often backfires.

We judge for several reasons:

1. Cognitive Biases – Our brains are wired to take mental shortcuts (heuristics), which can lead to confirmation bias, where we only notice what confirms our existing beliefs.
2. Emotional Discomfort – Judgment is often a way to discharge discomfort. For example, if we feel insecure around someone successful, we might judge them as arrogant to feel better about ourselves.
3. Cultural Conditioning – We are shaped by norms, values, and stereotypes passed down through family, media, and education, all of which influence who and what we judge.

Everyday Examples: How Judging Replaces Observation

Example 1: At the Workplace

Imagine a colleague who frequently misses deadlines. An observer might say, “I noticed the last three reports were submitted late.” A judge might think, “He’s lazy and irresponsible.”

But what if this person is struggling with a sick parent or battling depression? Judging without understanding shuts the door to empathy, while observing opens it.

Example 2: Social Media Posts

You see someone post a selfie in an expensive restaurant. Judgment might say, “They’re so superficial.” But observation would be: “This person posted a picture while dining out.”

We don’t know the story behind the image—perhaps it’s a rare celebration, or maybe it’s a small joy in a difficult life. Judgment invents motives; observation recognizes boundaries.

Example 3: In Schools

Teachers may label a student as “disruptive” without observing the root cause of their behavior—hunger, trauma, or learning differences. A judgmental label can follow that child for years, impacting their self-image and potential.

The Cultural Problem: A Judgmental Society

Across cultures—especially in collectivist societies like Pakistan—judgment often masquerades as moral concern.

We say:

• “She’s too bold.”
• “He’s not respectable.”
• “This family isn’t good.”

But these are social judgments, not facts. We confuse observation (“She wore jeans”) with cultural disapproval (“She’s dishonorable”). This confusion fuels gossip, exclusion, and even honor-based violence.

In public discourse, judgmental language also divides societies. Media headlines often turn facts into inflammatory statements:

• Observation: “Leader met with foreign delegates.”
• Judgment: “Leader begs for support abroad.”

Subtle word choices ignite emotion, reducing the space for rational thinking or constructive dialogue.

Observation in Journalism and Justice

In journalism, the line between observation and judgment determines credibility. A journalist must report what is seen, heard, and verified, not what they think it means. The shift toward opinion-based content, however, has blurred this line.

In courts of law, the principle is clear: innocent until proven guilty. Observation gathers evidence; judgment is made only after a thorough review. But public opinion and social media often reverse this order, engaging in what is known as trial by media.

The Danger of Self-Judgment

It’s not just others we judge—we do it to ourselves, constantly:

• “I failed. I’m useless.”
• “I made a mistake. I’m a terrible person.”
• “I don’t look good. I’m unworthy.”

Self-observation, by contrast, leads to growth:

• “I failed. That’s part of learning.”
• “I made a mistake. I will correct it.”
• “I feel insecure about my appearance, but my worth is not defined by looks.”

Therapists often help clients shift from harsh self-judgment to compassionate observation because change begins with understanding, not condemnation.

Mindfulness and the Power of Nonjudgmental Observation

Mindfulness teaches that when we observe without judgment, we:

• reduce stress
• improve emotional regulation
• gain clarity in relationships
• become better decision-makers

Try this practice:

1. Sit quietly for two minutes.
2. Observe your breath, your thoughts, your bodily sensations.
3. Label nothing as good or bad—just notice.

This small practice builds the muscle of awareness without analysis, helping us live more peacefully and compassionately.

Judgment Is Not Always Bad—But It Requires Responsibility

It’s important to clarify: judgment is sometimes necessary. We must assess people’s behavior to protect ourselves and others. Employers must evaluate job performance; citizens must assess political candidates.

But here’s the key: judgment must come after observation and understanding—never before.

When we rush to judgment, we:

• overlook complexity
• damage relationships
• reinforce stereotypes
• close the door to learning

Responsible judgment is deliberate, fair, and compassionate. Rash judgment is the opposite.

How to Practice Observation in Daily Life

1. Slow Down

o             Before labeling something or someone, pause. Ask: What exactly did I see or hear?

2. Use Descriptive Language

o             Replace “He’s rude” with “He interrupted three times during the meeting.”

3. Ask Questions, Not Conclusions

o             “Why might this person have acted this way?” instead of “They’re just like that.”

4. Check Cultural Biases

o             Reflect on whether your judgment comes from cultural norms or personal values—they’re not always the same.

5. Practice Active Listening

o             Observe not just what people say, but how they say it, and what may lie beneath.

6. Journal Without Labels

o             Write daily events and emotions without evaluating them. “I felt tension in the meeting,” instead of “The meeting was a disaster.”

7. Teach Children the Skill of Observation

o             Help them describe their experiences before assigning value. This fosters emotional intelligence and empathy.

A Personal Story: From Judgment to Understanding

I once labeled a neighbor as “antisocial” because he never greeted anyone. I told myself he was arrogant. Months later, I learned he was dealing with the recent loss of his wife and was deeply withdrawn. My judgment had kept me from offering support; my lack of observation had cost us both a connection.

When I finally knocked on his door with tea and conversation, I discovered a gentle man who just needed time and understanding. I had misjudged silence for pride.

That moment taught me a lasting lesson: What you see is not always what it means.

Reclaiming the Discipline of Observation

In a world where judgments are instant—fueled by 280-character tweets, filtered Instagram stories, and polarized media—learning to observe without rushing to conclusions is a revolutionary act.

Observation requires patience, empathy, humility, and courage. It asks us to see people and situations as they are, not as we assume or prefer them to be.

It is only when we observe clearly that we can judge wisely. And sometimes, when we observe long enough, we realize that judgment is not needed at all—only understanding.

So the next time your mind begins to label, pause. Breathe. Ask: Am I seeing clearly, or just judging quickly?

Because the world needs fewer judges—and far more witnesses.